There and back again
the story of Bilbo Baggins the Hobbit Salesman with apologies to JRT
the story of Bilbo Baggins the Hobbit Salesman with apologies to JRT
Gandalf the Whizard Sales Manager, persuades Bilbo Baggins ( Account
Executive of Hobbiton Enterprises) into attending a networking meeting with Business Ameretti networking club. Attendees include Thorin (the former Account manager for Hobbiton who
had Lonely Mountain Corp as a former client)), and
the band of dwarves from Hobbiton
Operations, Production, HR ,Marketing Finance ,Credit Control, Compliance,
Distribution, Security, and Sales Support.
During the event they break into song and sing of reclaiming the lost business from former client Lonely Mountain Corp and its vast treasure from the incumbent competitor the dragon Theo Smaug .
When the music ends, Gandalf unveils a the mysterious sales process map :-
During the event they break into song and sing of reclaiming the lost business from former client Lonely Mountain Corp and its vast treasure from the incumbent competitor the dragon Theo Smaug .
When the music ends, Gandalf unveils a the mysterious sales process map :-
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| The Skyfall Sales Journey map in Runes Looking for clues to translate the runes ? Click on this link. |
Translating the runes earlier Gandalf had discovered a link via Linked In into a Group
forum discussion.
Amongst the threads of group members he noticed that JR Ewing-Tolkeen the MD of
Lonely Mountain Corp, Dallas is a keen member of the discussion group. Scrolling through the comments Gandalf picks up a need from a post by Ewing-Tolkien whch Hobbiton product Superhobbit could match his need and indeed add value.
Gandalf proposes that the dumbfounded Bilbo serve as the expedition's "prospective door opener".
The dwarves ridicule the idea since Baggins has only ever reactively managed an acount and had never sold proactively. Bilbo indignant at their scorn is provoked , joins the proactive venture despite himself.
Gandalf proposes that the dumbfounded Bilbo serve as the expedition's "prospective door opener".
The dwarves ridicule the idea since Baggins has only ever reactively managed an acount and had never sold proactively. Bilbo indignant at their scorn is provoked , joins the proactive venture despite himself.
The group leave the comforts of virtualselling in their comfortable and warm hobbit office with its desk top PC and travel out into the cold and wild outside world of reality.
Their intial attempts at gaining appointments founder and Gandalf saves the team from the perils of the dreaded blockade of the telephone reception objecting loathing lazy salespeople aka trolls who always ask whether an appointment was made or challenge for reasons for enquiries before putting through Hobbits to any Lonely Mountain employees.
Their intial attempts at gaining appointments founder and Gandalf saves the team from the perils of the dreaded blockade of the telephone reception objecting loathing lazy salespeople aka trolls who always ask whether an appointment was made or challenge for reasons for enquiries before putting through Hobbits to any Lonely Mountain employees.
Bilbo’s superb rapport building skills
persuade the trolls to lead them to Rivendell Department . The result of which is a request
for information RFQ where Elrond a past supporter and contact within Lonely
Mountain Corp reveals more secrets for their Client Journey map.
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| Film poster for Hobbit on the London Buses |
Passing over the Misty Mountains of Attention getters, Investigation period and matching solutions, they are
captured by goblins who favour the
incumbent supplier and drive Bilbo and the dwarves deep underground with delaying tactics, not
answering phone calls and evasive emails.
Although Gandalf with his past experience of
earlier dealings with Lonely Mountain
Corp over the years rescues them, Bilbo gets separated from the others as they
flee from the goblins.
Lost in the goblin tunnels, Bilbo stumbles
across a mysterious ring and then encounters Gollum the chief of Procuremment who has a touch of Jedi in his blood and language, who engages him in a taxing game
of riddling objections.
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| Gollum's Riddle 1 : Tr. Hobbiton are more expensive than Smaug you are” |
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| Gollum's Riddle 2 Tr”I’m sure what you say about the new Hobbiton product is correct but happy with our present supplier Smaug we are" Other riddles further in thsi post |
As a reward for solving all riddles Gollum
will show him the path out of the tunnels, but if Bilbo fails, his chance of
being on the approved supplier list will be forfeited.
With
the help of the SKYFALL selling method, which confers total selling cedibility,
Bilbo escapes and rejoins the support dwarves, improving his reputation with
them. The goblins and Wargs give chase but the company
are saved by eagles before resting
in the house of Beorn.
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| Gollum's Riddle 3: Tr. “Changing back to Hobbiton is too much
hassle and the learning curve and retraining of goblins will not be worthwhile”
|
The team enters the black forest of Mirkwood without Gandalf. In Mirkwood, Bilbo first
saves the dwarves from giant spiders and their virus glitch webs
and then from the dungeons of the
Wood-elves. Nearing the Lonely Mountain, the travellers are welcomed by the
human inhabitants of the Lake-town shop
floor who have to use the Smaug product which they dislike intensely,.
The
users hope the dwarves will
fulfil account development plan of Smaug's
demise. The expedition travels to the Lonely Mountain and finds the secret door; Bilbo scouts the dragon's
lair, stealing a great cup and learn of a weakness in Smaug's Offer.
The enraged dragon, deducing that Lake-town has aided the intruder, sets out to
destroy the town. A noble thrush called Twitter who overheard Bilbo's report of Smaug's
vulnerability reports it to Bard
former champion of Hobbiton at Lonely Mountain Corp who gets Smaug removed from
the short list .
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| Gollum's Riddle 4 .”
Six weeks delivery is too much . We could probably get something similar from Dragons R Us and they have it ex stock.” |
When the dwarves take possession of the
mountain, Bilbo finds the Arkenstone,
an heirloom of Thorin's dynasty. The Wood-elves and Lake-men
besiege the mountain and request compensation for their aid, reparations for
Lake-town's destruction, and settlement of old claims on the treasure. Thorin refuses and, having summoned
his kin from the mountains of the North, reinforces his position.
Bilbo tries to ransom the Arkenstone to head off a war, but Thorin is intransigent. He banishes Bilbo, and battle seems inevitable.
Bilbo tries to ransom the Arkenstone to head off a war, but Thorin is intransigent. He banishes Bilbo, and battle seems inevitable.
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| Gollum's Riddle 5: Tr “ Leave it with me” |
Gandalf reappears to warn all of an approaching army of goblins and Wargs.
The dwarves, men, and elves band together, but only with the timely arrival of the eagles and Beorn do they win the climactic Battle of Five Armies.
Thorin is fatally wounded and reconciles with Bilbo before he dies. Bilbo accepts only a small portion of his share of the target, having no want or need for more, but still returns home a very wealthy hobbit
Thorin is fatally wounded and reconciles with Bilbo before he dies. Bilbo accepts only a small portion of his share of the target, having no want or need for more, but still returns home a very wealthy hobbit
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